1. If we see your tampon string. There is nothing wrong with seeing a vagina tail. Don't freak out because we saw the thing you're using to stop your vagina from dripping blood all over. Trust us, that's much better than the alternative.

2. If you don't want to have sex while you're ravaged by cramps. I wouldn't want to have sex either if my abdominal muscles were trying to make me shit out my stomach.

3. If you do want to have sex. I mean, that's cool too. You know, like, whatever ... I guess I could have sex, sure...

4. If you pull your tampon out in front of us right before sex. WHATEVER, IT DOESN'T MATTER, LET'S JUST GET TO THE SEX PART, YOU DON'T NEED TO SCREAM, "EW, GROSS," AND THEN RUN INTO THE BATHROOM.

5. If you tell us you're on your period. That's fine. I pooped three times today. When you're in a relationship (even if it's just a hookup relationship), these things don't matter.

6. If you tell us you have PMS. Especially if it's putting you in a really bad mood. We'll back off and give you some space and let you do ... I dunno, period stuff.

7. If you keep tampons or pads at our place. If you're sleeping over a lot, this is totally fine. Just don't punch holes in the wall and start stashing tampons in them the first time you go to a guy's place.

8. If you ask us to buy you some tampons or pads. Also perfectly normal. No man is going to feel weird about buying tampons unless for some reason he has an irrational fear that people think he secretly has a vagina. I really don't get why this freaks people out.

9. If we see your stained underwear. It's not like we want you to Snapchat us all your period stains or anything; we're just perfectly capable of glossing over them. As far as we're concerned, you left them on the bathroom floor and we never saw them. We were never even in the bathroom. What's a bathroom?

10. If you get blood on our sheets. We can wash them, calm down.

11. If you get blood on us. We can wash ourselves, calm down. I know it might be embarrassing to assume everything is good down there, only for your guy to come up looking like Tom Sawyer tricked him into painting a red picket fence with his penis, but it's fine. We just had sex; we can ignore a little blood.

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Cosmo Frank
I am a human male that enjoys consuming meals consisting of all five food groups and fulfilling every level of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. I write about sex-having.