1. Bring anything to dinner. You don't need to freak out and cook eight different desserts to wheel over to their house the first time you have dinner with your boyfriend's family, just don't show up empty-handed. Bring a bottle or two of your favorite wine, and if you don't have a favorite wine, just grab whatever is $15 and say it's your favorite.
2. Mention something you know they like. Suss out one thing you have in common with them from your boyfriend, and bring it up early. Maybe your parents thought family dinner was important or you've both traveled to the same place or you know a tiny bit about golf. They'll just be relieved to have something to talk about with you.
3. Share a fun story about a time you influenced their son to do something. You want a story that shows your opinion is important to him, without coming off as pushy or controlling. GOOD: "I got Dylan to finally try Brussels sprouts." BAD: "I got Dylan to shave his head and get a tattoo of the elder god Cthulhu and join my cult."
4. Touch your boyfriend's arm lovingly. A hand on his shoulder shows you love him. A hand on his ass shows that you are currently extremely horny for their son. You don't want his family thinking your whole relationship is based on sex, even if that's true.
5. Get in good with the pets. Unless you're deathly allergic to cat hair, make sure the pets love you. If they have a dog, then for the next two hours you're in that house, you are a dog person. Most people with pets like you if their pets like you, which is dumb because pets are stupid and really easy to impress.
6. Ask what your boyfriend was like when he was younger. People love to talk about themselves and their families. Fact. Other fact: Parents love embarrassing their kids.
7. Compliment their other kids. Kids are like smarter pets. Make sure your boyfriend's siblings don't get overlooked. If you make a great impression on the parents but the little brother is saying, "I didn't like her," the moment the door shuts behind you, you might as well have shown up in a garbage bag and broke all their fine china.
8. Take your shoes off. Even if they tell you to keep them on, at least you tried. Manners are fancy.
9. Speak up immediately. Don't stare at your boyfriend and let him do all the talking for you. Assert your personality. That doesn't mean you have to kick their door down and scream, "Hello, future in-laws!" Just make sure you put yourself out there enough that they get a sense of who you are. Silence is creepy.
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