1. The hella old, beige, comfortable one. Actually, it started out beige, but its barely even a color anymore. Youve been wearing the shit out of it since high school and its been washed so often that its like the thin beigey-grey of old person skin. Its so comfy that you forget youre wearing it during the day, and you know you should get rid of it eventually, but you keep it for Sundays. (And end up wearing it every day.
2. The borderline trashy red and/or hot pink pushup. At a certain point as a young, female lingerie consumer, every girl realizes that the guy she is dating does not care about the really beautiful gossamer dragonfly wing pastel bralette that hints at understated sensuality, costs $1,000 dollars and has probably been featured on Gwyneth Paltrows GOOP. Nope, he likes the unsubtle $16 bras at mall chain stores with the rhinestones on them. So, whatever. You own them.
3. The gossamer dragonfly pastel bralette. A lace creation that offers zero support or padding that you got because your super classy friend said that bralettes without underwire were more European. On the one hand, they make your boobies feel like the boobies of a wood nymph. On the other hand, when they turn on the AC in your office youre the mayor of Nipple City.
4. The disgusting sports bra. A hideous rag that only emerges from the drawers for yoga, and only the classes that dont pretend to be yoga but are really semi-passive aggressive Lululemon-themed fashion shows.
5. The really cute, expensive sports bra. For that second type of class I just mentioned, and also for toning or cardio at a unisex gym that features two-way mirrors and MAYBE overlooks college boys playing basketball. Not that I am thinking of the specific gym that I used to go to.
6. The American Apparel lame tube bra you bought in early college. And thought youd never wear again, but actually you wear it every time you wear a strapless shirt and cant find your good strapless bra, which is all the damn time.
7. The really cute retro bra-and-high-waist-panties set. You splurged on it at Anthropologie or on Modcloth but dont wear it enough because you sometimes think you cant pull off the high-waist underwear look without looking like your Great Aunt Sylvia.
8. The zillion dollar La Perla bra-and-thong set. You barely wear it because the underwire is so intense it pokes into your heart/brains/existence, but when you do, you feel like a high-end hooker in a very good way.
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